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Accepting My Natural Hair

As my hair begins to grow, it’s coming into its own. As I learn how to care for my natural hair I’m getting more used to it. As a matter of fact, I’m liking it. Imagine that…after decades of wishing my hair wasn’t like it was, I’m happy with the hair God gave me. That’s a revelation for me. Read my earlier post for more about my decision to grow natural.

Hesitatingly Owning ItLibrary

The other day I went to the library to pick up a few books. As I was walking up the ramp to the library, I looked in the window and saw a Black woman of about my age inside. She had her hair cut short as I had mine prior to letting it to grow. When I saw her, I started telling myself the woman will take one look at my hair and shake her head in disgust. “Why won’t that woman take a comb to her hair,” she said in my mind. It’s amazing the types of conversations that will enter the mind when you’re unsure of yourself.

I walked into the library and did what I had to do. The woman and I never really had a chance to interact. She was down an aisle and I was at the front desk picking up a book I had on reserve. I picked up my book and went on to my next errand at the grocery store.

Perusing the Grass Fed/Grass Finished Beef

While I was perusing the grass-fed beef looking for the best bones to make my next batch of bone broth, who did I see in the organic beef section? The very same woman who was in the library. As I looked up and saw her looking at me (in my mind I just knew she was going to say something less than complimentary about my natural hair), I asked, “Weren’t you just in the library?” I smiled and she smiled too.Grass Fed Beef

Her reply was, “I was going to ask you the same question. I was just looking at your hair…(here it comes)…and admiring it.” HUH??? Did I hear that right? I guess the look on my face gave me away. She went on further to say that she loved the way my twists looked and complimented me on the thickness, health and appearance of my hair.

She then asked where did I go to get my hair done. I smiled in shock and disbelief and told her I did it myself. I had just washed my hair and this is the way it looks when I don’t comb it out.


She went on even further and said she wished she had hair like mine. She wanted to wear her hair as I did, but her natural hair was too thin. She finished off by saying, “You must get a lot of compliments on your hair.” I answered honestly and said, “You’re my first compliment.” We both smiled. She told me that I’ll be getting a lot of compliments on my hair. I thanked her and went on my way.

Honestly speaking, the only compliments I received for my natural hair was from my daughter, but she’s the one pushing me to let my hair grow. My husband also complimented my hair, but he really doesn’t care if my hair is short or long. He goes along with the program. The woman in the grocery store did much to boost my confidence in wearing my hair naturally. She was the right age and right ethnicity for me to actually hear her compliment and believe it to be sincere.

I realize some people will like my hairstyle and some won’t, but it’s cool. As long as I’m happy and my internal dialogue matches, it’s all good!


About the author: Felicia has learned the hard way that health, whether good or bad, is a result of daily choices and habits. On this blog, Felicia shares what she’s learned and the healthier choices she now makes as a result of her new knowledge. She hopes to encourage others to experiment to find alternative solutions to nagging problems (she’s also is a bit of a tree hugger and likes to share ways to lighten the toxic burden on the environment).

in Hair

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  • Loretta Parker-Brown May 9, 2017, 9:19 pm

    Felicia, I so enjoyed reading your post “Accepting My Natural Hair.” Years ago, I was a reluctant convert. Now, I’ve worn my hair natural since cutting out my perm around 1985 with no regrets. Thanks for sharing your story.

    • Felicia May 9, 2017, 6:24 pm

      Hey Loretta, thanks for stopping by.

      Actually, I’ve been wearing my hair natural since the 1980’s but I’ve always worn it very short. I’m talking buzz cut short. Now that I’m letting it grow, I’m learning quite a bit about caring for my hair and it’s an interesting journey.

      • Loretta May 15, 2017, 10:48 am

        My hair is too thin now to have the Angela Davis fro that I wore in the late 60s, early 70s, so I keep it trimmed short now. I look forward to following your hair care journey.