A Dose of Health

The other day at the grocery store checkout line, I got to watch the thin woman in front of me place her items on the conveyor belt. She was dressed in white shorts and an aqua blue top. All of her clothes were form fitting.

Although she had an attractive figure for an exceptionally thin woman, something struck me as odd. I did a quick glance up and down and realized what it was. This woman did not have a hint of a muscle anywhere on her body (at least from what I could see).

Her arms and her legs lacked muscle tone. Yes she was thin, but she probably had a high percentage of body fat. When she walked, her thin little calves jiggled.

You Are What You Eat (Or Don’t Eat)

I then looked at what she was purchasing. It gave me a clue as to how she developed such a physique. She had in her cart 4 cases of Diet Pepsi, two packs of gum and 3 boxes of something that I couldn’t figure out what it was.

If she had on long pants and a long-sleeved shirt, I probably would have thought her to be a fit individual. However by exposing her toneless arms and legs I quickly came to a different conclusion.

Thin at What Cost?

We live in a weird society that glorifies being thin. There’s no doubt that too much extra weight can tax the heart and other organs and systems in the human body, but being an unhealthy thin is no better. The type of thin the grocery store woman displayed made me wonder how long her bones were going to be able to carry her small frame without breaking.

Although she was very thin, I would bet that her body fat percentage was high. After all, she barely had any muscle. Muscular calves don’t jiggle, fatty ones do. Check out this article on skinny fat people and this one about being fat even when you’re not overweight .

Is there a purpose to this post?

Yeah, there is a purpose to this post somewhere in all the verbiage. What I’m getting at is that being thin isn’t the be all and end all. Being healthy is. If you’re packing a few extra pounds but you have healthy bones and muscle tone, I’d take that any day over being artificially thin (living on diet soda and cigarettes) and jiggly.

Just my opinion.

Well, after all of my recent posts on the colon, colon cancer and colonoscopies, I realized I hadn’t shared my experience with my life changing event.

The long and the short of it is that the prep work is the worst part and the actual colonoscopy was a breeze.

The Prep Instructions

There are several prep solutions used to clear the digestive tract before a colonoscopy. I was fortunate (or unfortunate) enough to have the HalfLytely prep. The instructions were to stop eating solids by 9:00 am, take two Bisacodyl pills (poop pills) at noon and then drink a ½ gallon of the HalfLytely prep starting at 6:00 pm. The instructions were to drink 8 oz every 10 minutes.

During the day I could only drink clear liquids such as tea, broth, coffee (without milk) and no red or purple liquids (so much for my glass of Merlot). All liquid intake must halt at midnight.

The Prep Lowdown

The instructions were pretty straight forward and not difficult to follow. If you tend to eat a lot, then you’re going to have a difficult time. Some folks are absentee eaters. In other words, they eat all day without realizing it. Other folks are just big eaters. If they go beyond 1 hour without food, their personality starts to change. If you fall into either of the above categories, advise your family to leave town whilst you undergo the prep. You’re going to be ornery.

I didn’t have too much of a problem with the prep. The HalfLyrwely Prep tastes bad no matter what you do with it so I recommend you refrigerate the prep the night before. Drinking it cold does seem to help a bit.

The Never Ending Bathroom Trek

My bathroom and I became fast friends. The HalfLytely is like the rinse cycle on a washing machine. It rinses all of the excess soap and softener for perfectly clean clothes. You can tell how clean the clothes are by the clearness of the rinse water. Think of yourself as going through a rinse cycle by the time you’re about done with HalfLytely. It’s amazing how clear things get.

The Actual Colonoscopy

First of all, I said it before and I’ll say it again, I don’t understand how anyone would voluntarily choose a career in looking in people’s rumps. That being said, I know for sure I was good and clear for the viewing. My appointment was at 11:00 and I’ve got to say that the procedure lasted all of about 15 minutes.

After confirming insurance and medical information, I was told to strip down to my skivvies (well less than skivvies) and put on one of those attractive hospital gowns with the opening in the rear. They strapped on a few monitors, told me to lie on my left side and then told me I would get sleepy in a few minutes (because of the anesthesia). I remember replying “This stuff works fast,” and the next thing I knew I was waking up from a most fantastic restful sleep.

My sleep was so sound that I asked, “When can I come back for my next colonoscopy?”

I was fortunate to have a clean bill of health, got dressed and went home. The whole procedure from check in to check out was about an hour.

Nothing to Fear but Fear Itself

There is nothing to be afraid of. Not going and not knowing is much worse.

There are a couple of good things that people don’t think about after having a colonoscopy.

The first good thing is finding out whether or not you have a clean bill of health. Which ever way the diagnosis leads, it’s all good. If you are all clear, no polyps no tears, then that’s great. It’s a sigh of relief and a good indication that you’re doing something right.

If the diagnosis isn’t so stellar, it’s also good. At least you now know what needs to be done in order to restore your colon back to health. It’s your opportunity to learn how to avoid repeating the same lifestyle habits that created the problem in the first place (Yes, even those with a genetic predisposition for colon issues can do something about your colon health).

Another Good Thing about Having a Colonoscopy

The second good thing about having a colonoscopy is that your insurance company gets to pay for you to have a colon cleanse. No longer do you have to watch those infomercials about the benefits of cleaning out your colon. You get to do it in one fell swoop and get to have someone else look in there to make sure it’s all clean. Doesn’t get any better than that (still can’t figure out why someone would want to look in folk’s rear ends for a living).

The ‘New Leaf’ Good Thing about a Colonoscopy

Now that your bowel is all clean and clear, it’s time to slowly reintroduce foods back into your system. It’s your clean slate and your chance to eat right, get the necessary fiber, and maintain a clean colon for optimal health.

At this time food absorption and nutrient absorption should be optimal. Try eating good healthy and organic foods (if possible) for a while. Give your body a treat. After all, you recently put it through a bit of a tough time trying to clean it out. Apologize to it by giving it quality food. Now is a perfect time to rebuild the intestinal bacteria with a few probiotics (Green Vibrance is my probiotic of choice).

Having a Colonoscopy Dispelled a Long-Held Myth

If you’re squeamish, then stop reading now. Go to another post or click on one of the links in my blogroll. For those of you who have the same sense of wonder as I do, continue reading.

I’ve watched a few infomercials and read lots of information about healthy colons and healthy bowel movements. I’ve long been told that adult bowel movements are small in diameter because of the junk caked up within the walls of the digestive system. To further drill in the point, some infomercials claim that adult bowel movements should be large in diameter. To back up the claim they refer to the size of a child’s stool (here’s your last chance to click away if you’re squeamish).

Unfortunately, I’ve had the …er…pleasure (?) of having to use the bathroom after a child has forgotten to flush. I’ve also had the …er…pleasure of having to view my child’s production as he and she (in varying stages of their lives), were proud to show me what they were able to do (what we parents must go through when potty training).

I would look at the production and marvel at how something so large could come out of such a cute little rump. We affectionately called them torpedo turds. Drop one of those on the enemy and they’re done for.

No matter how much fiber I ate, how clean my diet or how much water I drank; there was no way I could produce such a specimen. My quest for torpedo turds almost caused me to purchase one of the colon cleansing products. Instead I had a colonoscopy.

Now to the Myth

After a full cleaning and returning to a healthy diet, there is no way that I’m able to build a torpedo. Short of cultivating a diet of French Fries and Chicken Nuggets, there is no way on earth this body can do it. There are many levels on which I can compete with my kids. This is not one of them.